If you liked the trailer, congratulations! You’ve essentially seen the film. What isn't already revealed in the trailer is very predictable. Nice, but predictable.

I thought that the handling of the Western influence in Asia and the Chinese reaction to it was well done. All in all though, I am weary of movies where the civilized White people show up and save the uncivilized Non-White people. This happens in far too many films, a low-point for this plot-device occurs in the Kevin Bacon's "The Air Up There" where he travels to Africa to teach tall, black men to play basketball. Why? Well, to eventually save them from an evil mining corporation or some such nonsense. After saving the villagers, I’m sure Kevin’s character walked away with a broader worldview and a better sense of how awesome it is to be white.

So, starting with humor, I understand why this film rubbed some folks the wrong way. The funniest bits for me were the self-referential jokes (like Jacky Wu Jing’s Jet Li and Wong Fei Hung references were great). I’m sure there are those viewers, however, who thought that that humor was distracting. I’m sure it didn’t help those who thought that the tone was a little confused. I’m sure there are those who didn’t like the “young love” story. Yes, the entire plot is lifted from other sources ("Danny the Dog", "Ong-Bak", a bit of "MacBeth", etc.). Yes, there are many clichés (like the fact that he’ll be asked to throw a fight). I’m not ruining anything, like other reviewers, because that plot point is predictable. And finally, yes, there are a couple of slower scenes that should have been removed.

Speaking of the story, generally regarded here are fairly thin, I thought that the meditation on the corruption of prostitution was really interesting. In the movie, every fighter is paid by the mob because of what they can do with their body. Wu Jing’s girl in the film, played by cutesy teen, Miki Yeung, becomes his pimp early in the film while another friend becomes an “actual” prostitute. All this plays into the broader theme (outside of ass-kicking) of money and the sacrifices and gambles people will make for it. This is really the central motivator played out the poor, rich, good guys, and villains in the film. In fact, I thought there was some interesting attention paid to this theme among the distinct strata of Triads.

I have a final thought on the theme of “underground” fighting in movies: I have always viewed this concept as a necessary evil (at best) in order to facilitate more ass-kicking. From "Enter the Dragon", "Bloodsport", "Danny the Dog" ("Unleashed"), "Ong-Bak", "Balls of Fury", etc., there is this idea that the Best Fighters in the World can be gathered for a fight to the death. Yeah, right. Why would a man train for 20 years so he can step in to the ring to fight to the Death? For money? Um, professional non-lethal fighters can win money without becoming professional murderers. If wealthy mobsters and socialites wanted to pay to see folks fight to the death, they’d be watching untrained (probably chronically mentally ill) homeless people. Fatal Bum Contact would make a bad film though. Hopefully writers will keep thinking of better reasons for the good guy to bust out the Fu without resorting to this lame plot device.

I certainly wasn't disappointed. There were moments of sheer directorial brilliance. The cast is top notch. The story and characters are interesting. The characters, two peasant couples in a war-ravaged land, seem to spend the length of the movie making the worst choices possible; usually out of various forms of greed. The tension isn't about "will they run into trouble" but "when" and "how much."

This is what I call a "film school" movie. It's something that could be played for budding directors who could dwell endlessly on the minutia of long takes, lighting, composition, etc. This isn't a bad thing, per se, but don't expect an action movie. Ugetsu is great at period drama and social commentary but not a single car explodes nor are any young martial-artists trained to avenge their sifu.

I had calibrated my expectations low enough for a movie "inspired" by a video game but, man, what a crapfest. I really wanted to like it, if only for Sammo and Yuen Biao, but I couldn't do it. The special effects were neither special nor effective. For example: in one scene a kid holds up his fist with thumb at his ear and his pinky extended to his mouth to answer the phone. 'Cause, you know, in the future your cell phone with be an Avenging Fist Phone with optional pinky boom-mic attachment. That’s not futuristic; that’s extremely lazy filmmaking. There were other effects that tried to simulate Amime and Video game fighting. These failed.

But what about the story, you ask? Don’t ask. If there was one, it sucked. Acting? Yep, there some acting happening. Martial Arts? Um, see “special effects” above. The one thing promised that was delivered is that most of the cast (Sammo and Yuen excluded) are both young and hip. Yep, very hip. And pretty too; all the boys and girls are pretty. If you want hip and pretty, I suggest downloading JPop videos from the web instead.

One final thought: You might be thinking that any film with “Avenging Fist Finger Phones” must fall into the category of so-bad-it's-good. Feel free to apply generous doses of alcohol and see if you can find some enjoyment in this mess. Personally, the director seemed to just suck all the joy out of the film (maybe in an attempt to make a kung-fu "Blade Runner"?) that I couldn’t enjoy it on any level.