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John Firth's Profile

Avg. Film Rating: 
 2.99 / 5

Agreement: 92% of 13 voters agree with John Firth's reviews
Gender: Male
Age: 30
Location: Newcastle upon Tyne, UK
Web Site: http://www.myspace.com/johnafirth
Lists: WISH LIST (213)

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

The Kung Fu Instructor (product link)
Martial Arts / Action/Adventure

A lesser Ti Lung Shaw film. There are a few flashes of brilliance here, mainly with the choreography, but the story itself just isn't very interesting.

Ti Lung himself is great, as usual, but the film feels like it was made up as they went along (not an altogether uncommon practice in Hong Kong it seems).

One note regarding the ending that I saw in one of the other reviews - it wasn't a defeat the villain to prove you're right ending; there was correspondence between Sha Er Lang and Meng Er Da that was handed over to the authorities.

On a sadder note, whilst looking the film up on the internet, I found out that Wong Yue, Ti Lung's student in the film, passed away last month (May, 2008) as a result of hepatitis.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Garth Marenghi's Darkplace (product link)
TV Shows/Movies / Comedy

BUY THIS!

It's hilarious. A spoof of (amongst other things) daytime TV detective shows, hospital dramas, Stephen King and talking head DVD extras, it hits the spot perfectly.

You have actor Todd Rivers, who hasn't done a decent gig since Boon, porn-purveyor-turned-producer Dean Learner, and author, dreamweaver, visionary (plus actor) Garth Marenghi, all reminiscing on the lost TV classic, Darkplace. Sadly, Madeleine Wool was unable to make the reunion, as she's missing, presumed dead.

The DVD extras are hilarious too, especially the radio adverts.

AGREE?READER COMMENTSAUTHOR
YYes! Thank you! Why don't more people know about this show? It's HILARIOUS!!Choco
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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

The Sister Street Fighter Collection [4-Disc Set] (product link)
Action/Adventure / Martial Arts



Warning - lots of brackets and thought-drifting rambling may be visible.

This set is great! I've been hoping for a restored release of the Sister Street Fighter films ever since Optimum released Sonny Chiba's Street Fighter trilogy in the UK. Sadly no UK release has been forthcoming, but this Brentwood set's very reasonably priced and well-restored.

Chiba himself makes an appearance in the first film, although not as Takuma Tsurugi (from his Street Fighter films). The action choreography's similar, as are several cast members (Masashi Ishibashi, from the first two Street Fighter films, appears in at least the first two Sister films, if not the third as well), but the first three Sister films are a hell of a lot more wild and wacky.

The villains are pretty much all dressed in bizarre costumes, and carry traditional weapons at all times. Never ask why no-one carries a gun - it's like asking why Bond villains don't just shoot Bond in the head when they capture him. I can only imagine the glee the costume department took when they set to work.

The great Yasuaki Kurata co-stars in the second and third films (as different characters), which is reason enough to watch them anyway. I've a feeling Japanese action cinema at the time had an even smaller talent pool to play with than Hong Kong, given you see several actors appear in more than one film, yet playing someone else each time.

The first three films follow fairly similar stories, but all are fun, if a little sadistic at times. The fourth film, Fifth Level Fist, is a bit different however.

Fifth Level Fist is a sequel in name only, with Etsuko Shihomi playing a completely different character here. There's a disappointing lack of crazy villains here, but there's a few Western actors involved, who appear to be speaking Japanese, rather than being dubbed, like they would have been in Hong Kong. I was rather impressed with the rather open treatment the film-makers gave the racist abuse two of the characters suffered in their youth. It's not something you expect in a Martial Arts film, and was handled very well.

I doubt I've covered why I actually recommend these films with the above meandering waffle. Basically, you get a very pretty leading lady who kicks major-league ass, crazy henchmen, a few naked ladies, Sonny Chiba, and Yasuaki Kurata. You also get Etsuko Shihomi displaying some rather fine nunchaku technique as well.

AGREE?READER COMMENTSAUTHOR
Yyes you're right i think these films are entertaining and at the hkflix price this boxset is a snip.kung fu kid
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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Opium And The Kung-Fu Master (product link)
Martial Arts / Action/Adventure

Whilst this follows the age-old fight-lose-train-win formula of many a martial arts movie, Opium... has the benefit of starring the great Ti Lung and Chen Kuan-tai.

Peppered with great fights, a nice cold turkey sequence (though not as good as Gene Hackman's, despite Ti Lung's theatrics), and good performances from Ti Lung and Chen Kuan-tai, Opium and the Kung-Fu Master is well worth seeking out. Late-period Shaw Brothers films really don't come much better than this.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

The Kid With A Tattoo (product link)
Martial Arts / Action/Adventure

Whilst wildly inconsistent, mainly due to the film's tone swinging from serious to comedic without pausing for breath, and lacking a strong lead performance, The Kid With A Tattoo is worth watching mainly for the last half hour. The action there is fantastic.

Plus Yuen Wah's always worth watching.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Tube (product link)
Action/Adventure / Thriller

Kim Suk-Hoon spends most of the film trying to be Chow Yun-Fat, and fails miserably.

Bless them for trying, but emulating flashy, empty Hollywood blockbusters isn't the way to go.

The characters were dull, as was the story. The effects looked cheap too.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Shaolin Temple [1982] (product link)
Martial Arts / Drama

This is a great film. Not quite as good as "Martial Arts of Shaolin", but vastly superior to "Kids From Shaolin".

The story's pretty decent, especially compare to most HK kung fu films. The action scenes are fantastic, if a little too much like wushu demonstrations at times.

Animal lovers may wish to avoid this though. I'm not sure the dog and sheep deaths were faked. Early '80s China for you.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Princess Madam (product link)
Girls With Guns / Action/Adventure

I've got a copy of this on VHS. It's pretty much a bog-standard Girls With Guns film although, unfortunately, kungfucinema.com has this as another of Godfrey Ho's cut-and-paste films. To be honest, I never noticed, for which I'm quite ashamed. It's been a few years since I saw this in fairness, so another viewing might clear it up for me.

Decent enough for what it is, but there are far better films out there.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Scarlet Diva (product link)
Drama / Erotica

Boring, self-indulgent rubbish, featuring lots of softcore shots of real sex, Scarlet Diva shows Asia Argento sadly doesn't appear to have inherited her father's visual flair.

Lots of "arty" scenes and boring dialogue abound, in a story that never once strikes up any interest. Asia Argento's a good actress (though not here, and it's her film), but doesn't impress on this viewing as writer or director. Nice tattoo, though.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Drunken Master 2 (product link)
Martial Arts / Action/Adventure

Jackie's last great movie.

Despite the tension caused by Jackie and Lau Kar-leung clashing over choreography styles, DM2 remains a top-notch film.

Great performances come from Jackie, Ti Lung and the late, great Anita Mui, and Lau Kar-leung's action is as good as it's ever been.

I personally wasn't as impressed with the end battle as a lot of other people seem to have been. Too gimmicky for my tastes. However, there's plenty left that IS great.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

The Avenging Fist (product link)
Martial Arts / Action/Adventure

Turkey alert! Turkey alert!

Thankfully, this came from a bargain bin. I'g have been most unhappy had I paid full price for this piece of tat. All effects and no content. I hate Wong Jing as well.

A crap story, initially based on Tekken, but lawsuits abounded, and that went out of the window. So, having Sammo, Yuen Biao and Chin Kar-lok on board, did they allow them the freedom to kick ass? Erm, no. The leading roles seem to be talentless pretty-boys (and girls), none of whom have any degree of acting ability or martial skill. Quick, get the wirework ready and hire a CG team to cover everything in a glossy sheen...

Sadly this seems to be the norm. I tolerated "A Man Called Hero" and "Storm Riders", but this goes further down the path, and I'm prepared to waste my time with dross like this.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Casshern (product link)
Action/Adventure / Science Fiction

Overlong, ridiculously convoluted, and rubbish action scenes. I remember being so bored during this that I checked how long was left, only to find it was 40 minutes. It'd been on for over an hour and a half. I watched it all to see if it got any better. It didn't.

Tedious live action anime. I'm not the biggest anime fan in the world, which possibly didn't help. However, a good film's still a good film, no matter the medium. This outright sucked.

AGREE?READER COMMENTSAUTHOR
YI think you are too charitable in giving this movie a 1/2 star. This is quite possibly the only Japanese movie worse than Battle Royale 2.MS10197
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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

SPL: Sha Po Lang (product link)
Crime / Drama

This is a great film. Some gaping plot holes, admittedly, but the film sucks you in regardless. Simon Yam and Sammo are fantastic, and Wu Jing impresses as the villain. A nice change of pace after the underrated Tai Chi Boxer and the disappointing Drunken Monkey. Acting-wise, Donnie seemed to be the weak link, but more than made up for it with the action choreography.

Little undercranking or wirework (which shows the effect budget and cast talent has on Donnie's work) is evident here, and the two main fights are brutal. Donnie and Wu Jing duel with extandable baton and what looks like a wakizashi or tanto, and Donnie and Sammo have a bruising brawl, mixing kickboxing and jiu jitsu.

The story itself works pretty well, with the ever-watchable Simon Yam starring as a terminally-ill detective resorting to dubious methods in order to put Sammo's crime boss away.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Black Eagle (product link)
Action/Adventure / Martial Arts

A truly abysmal film. Sho Kosugi's never been the greatest of screen action stars, but this must rank as his worst film.

Terrible acting, fighting and plotting abound throughout this debacle. The only reason I own a copy (VHS) is because I went on holiday to Malta years ago, and it's nice to see places I've been to. That's the only reason this doesn't get a big ZERO. The Robin Williams Popeye movie was filmed in Malta too, so we visited the set for that as well.

Aside from that, the girl that follows Van Damme around's quite cute, but that hardly constitutes a reason to watch the film.

All in all, a nice fat turkey, all ready for eating at Christmas. Or Thanksgiving for you American folks.

AGREE?READER COMMENTSAUTHOR
YUm, yeah. Choco
YVan Damme and Sho Kosugi in the same film. Is that a recipe for greatness or what.MS10197
Yyou are right i think this film is garbage avoid like the plague.kung fu kid
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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Bang-Rajan: The Legend Of The Village Warriors [Australia SE 2-Disc Set] (product link)
Action/Adventure / War

This is the sort of film that puts recent Hollywood epics to shame. Sure, a lot of the acting's a little wonky , but the characters themselves all fit perfectly. The action's fantastic, full of bone-crunching knees and elbows, along with copious amounts of double-sword and double-axe fights. Plus, the Burmese are portrayed like the English are in bad Mel Gibson films - the most evil people known to mankind, which makes them highly suitable villains.

Shame the CG work is blatantly visible, but it shows Thai cinema's definitely worth keeping an eye open for. This and the films from the Ong Bak team have certainly opened the right doors.

AGREE?READER COMMENTSAUTHOR
Yi think this is a great thai movie with a good story and cool battle scenes.kung fu kid
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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Robotrix [Joy Sales] (product link)
Science Fiction / Girls With Guns

This one I enjoyed. Chikmako Aoyama is stunning, and Amy Yip was always worth watching.

Haven't seen for a while, as I sold some videos several years ago, and this was one of the first to go. Wish I'd kept it now.

What I do recall was Billy Chow killing prostitutes, and well-stacked girls fighting. If all Cat III films were like this, I'd buy them all, but sadly garbage like "Evil Instinct" and "Naked Killer" seems to be the norm.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Five Fingers Of Death (product link)
Martial Arts / Action/Adventure



Not a bad film, but not really a good one either.

Perhaps I've been spoilt by films along the way (Lau Kar-leung's Shaw Brothers directorial outings, and much of the Hong kong Legends series), but I didn't get much out of King Boxer choreography-wise. It seemed very much in the pre-Bruce Lee "Windmill Fist" vein, and it seemed to be running in slow motion at times.

In saying that, Lo Lieh made a good, intense hero, a role (like the great Hwang Jang Lee) he didn't get to play too often. Also, the crimson Shaw blood remains a favourite effect of mine, even after working my way through my beloved grubby Italian splatter-fests, George Romero and David Cronenberg films, and Ichi the Killer.

Looking at the story, King Boxer does have nice sub-plots, even if the characters never really develop. However, like I mentioned at the start, I've seen a lot better films since this was released, with Sammo and Lau Kar-leung primarily responsible for some of my favourites (ie The Victim, The Prodigal Son, Heroes of the East and The Eight Diagram Pole Fighter). It may be unfair to compare true "old-school" films with more modern pieces (even if only ten years separates them) but, unfortunately, that is what is going to happen, especially with Celestial reissuing about 75% of the Shaw Brothers catalogue.

Personally, King Boxer is a film I bought due to it's fame as the film that broke Chinese Martial Arts movies in the USA (under the name Five Fingers of Death). For that reason alone, it's one to own.

Oh, and it's still better than many, far more recent, American Martial Arts movies.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Zatoichi Meets The One Armed Swordsman (product link)
Swordplay/Sword(s) / Action/Adventure

Not the best of the Zatoichi films that I've seen, which is probably due to the presence of Jimmy Wang Yu. I've never seen the appeal he had in his Shaws days (Temple of the Red Lotus is one the worst HK films I've ever seen that's not a Wong Jing film), and here he again fails to impress. His Windmill Fist swordplay looks awful compared to Shintaro Katsu's work, and he can't act.
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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Body Weapon (product link)
Drama / Martial Arts



I rented this without realising it was from the Wong Jing stable - if I'd known, I'd never have bothered.

Where do I start? The misogyny? The homophobia? The wasting of Chiu Man Cheuk? Being a Wong Jing production? The completely ludicrous revenge storyline?

Whilst I'll admit that Wong Jing has come out with a few good films over the years (he's made so many that the law of averages says some of them must be watchable) this certainly isn't one of them. Whilst he isn't the director, his hallmarks are all over this film. Misogyny far beyond any of Sammo' films, a man who kills women seemingly solely because he's gay, and the wasting of a gifted martial arts star.

One thing I didn't work out is that, if the killer murdered one of the characters because he loved Chiu Man Cheuk, how does that explain the earlier victims?

I remember Bey Logan saying that this was one of the worst films he'd seen to come out of Hong Kong. He wasn't exaggerating. Avoid it like the plague.

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    by John Firth
    www.myspace.com/johnafirth

Odd Couple (product link)
Martial Arts / Comedy



An absolute masterpiece. The Odd Couple is one of the finest kung fu comedies ever made, and also one of the finest classical weapons movies to boot.

The choreography is stunning, especially the duel between the masters and Leung Kar-yan. For a man whose only real training came when he decided to work in films, Leung Kar-yan has superb control. How they didn't kill each other amazes me.

I have to admit, I though Dean Shek was hilarious as Master Rocking. He was a bit too strange in Warriors Two, but here he's just right. Funnily enough, before seeing any of the HKL series, I was unaware that Dean Shek had done roles like this. I'd only seen him in A Better Tomorrow II, where he'd done a rather good dramatic turn. I digress...

Anyway, this film is one of the finest Hong Kong martial arts films of all time. I still prefer 8 Diagram Pole Fighter for weapons scenes, but this comes very close to that.

AGREE?READER COMMENTSAUTHOR
Yi agree with you're review but i would of giving it 4 stars cos i think sammo's done better films.kung fu kid
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