Jackie Chan is a master of many arts and has my utmost respect. It is not unusual for me to watch one of his movies twice, maybe more. This film had me trying to find a way to get out of the first viewing! If this film is an example of his so called Hong Kong movies then he should go back to the US.

There were a half dozen rumours flying around the net about the plot. One rumour was that the “Three Dragons” Jackie, Biao and Sammo would return as three mischievous thieves, in an updated “Dragons Forever.” I keep telling people it ain’t gonna happen. And then the rumour regarding this being a very dark film. Jackie - baby - dark - no way.

Jackie (Slipper), Louis Koo (Octopus) and Michael Hui (Landlord) are all high stakes thieves. Slipper and Octopus are in the midst of stealing medication from a hospital (that’s a hospital?). As they are making their way out chaos begins! The son of a Triad boss thinks he has a newborn son. In reality it is an old girlfriend and her husband. In his mind it is his son and he is trying to kidnap the woman and baby. Unfortunately the Triad’s son is killed in an accident and his father vows to get his grand child because he too, is deluded and wants the baby.

The three thieves have alternative lives. Landlord is self explanatory, and his wife, Land Lady who needs major mental health care. Octopus, who is married but ignores his wife and looks for women who have a lot of money. Slipper pretends to be a business man but his father and the rest of the family know he is a thief and gambler. No matter what Slipper does he cannot please his father. Considering Jackie's age you would hope such displays of being a good loving son would be purged by now. However this movie is so formula you could give it to the baby! When Landlord is robbed of all his money the guys agree to take on a job to replace the money, but he doesn’t really tell them exactly what the job is at hand. Suffice to say it involves Slipper, Octopus and the baby. Yes two hours of watching two guys and a baby. Every baby joke ever used is used again. And again. And again. And again. One thing that would have definitely improved the movie was Yuen Biao whose on screen time was barely more than a cameo. Biao is a master in martial arts, action choreography and humour. And yet for some reason Jackie relegated him to a very short role.

There is no requirement for Jackie to do stunts and serious fighting, but if he is going to continue them he needs to be able to do them with finesse. One requires him to jump from one floor to the next by jumping on the air conditioners which are set staggered and not much of a stunt especially with a wire. Unfortunately it looked like a child could do it. Another “stunt” he slides down a long stairway banister. Not a lot of skill is required. I certainly don’t want Jackie to be injured or take stupid risks. I think he still has difficulty believing audiences will accept him as an actor without a few stunts along the way. He would he wrong on that count

One major complaint - the bad “gay” joke. Absolutely uncalled for and completely tasteless. Jackie should be ashamed to have something like that in “his” movie!

Everything is going along with the endless baby jokes when suddenly the movie whiplashes into a dark and ugly mode. Two hours of hackneyed jokes and it’s like running into a cement wall at high speed with no warning!

When the baby is turned over to his grandfather’s staff the gang has accomplished their task. But none of them feel good about what they have done. The sudden immersion into a macabre affair is not something you would usually see in a “Jackie” film but then it is not a “Jackie” movie and that’s the problem. Rob B Hood is part action, part drama, part comedy, part sap and as many “awwwww” moments as you can tolerate without requiring insulin. Jackie had virtual control over the film however he seems to have experienced difficulty in determining what kind of movie he wanted to make. It just didn’t work. As for the ending all I can say is Jackie hasn’t done this before and let us hope he will not do so again.