Agreement:91% of 159 voters agree with TheDenizen's reviews Gender: Male Age: 34 Location: Ontario, Canada Lists:WISH LIST (7) / OWNED LIST (296)
Bio: Kung Fu fanatic from Southern Ontario, Canada. I'm also into Samurai films, splatter horror, Spaghetti Westerns, Film Noir and grindhouse exploitation flicks.
The Foot Fist Way (product link) Comedy / Martial Arts A pretty funny parody of martial arts instructors who take themselves way too seriously. I know guys just like Danny McBride's character. The ending is sorta' cliche and it drags a bit in the middle, but there's lots to enjoy here if you like McBride's style.
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I think I'm a bigger Danny McBride fan than you, but yep. It's two for one crab legs--at Captain Orlander's!
Deadgirl (product link) Horror / Thriller Sooooo...this flick has zombie sex. And not the campy silly kind like in "Zombie Strippers". This is a filthy zombie girl chained to a bed and raped a bunch of times. The high school drama stuff framing it all is ridiculous, and nothing about the backstory is ever explained. The movie just hits you over the head with its premise pretty bluntly...again and again. The message: rape is bad. Uh yeah, thanks.
Wolverine never comes across as even remotely badass in this film. He sure cries a lot though, usually while staring upwards into a spinning camera, clutching the body of a dead loved one and screaming "Nooooooo!" (seriously, this happens like three times at least).
The final battle was pretty lame, too. Bad CGI throughout. Wolvie's claws looked really dumb and fake. Vaguely entertaining, this movie is nowhere near as cool as it should have been, which ultimately makes it a disappointment.
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Not great I must say. It needed blood and disembowlments. I recommend the video game over this.... uh thing!
Didn't bother to watch this one because it looked like exactly what you described. Why take such a high-profile character from a high-budget franchise and do this to it? They just diluted the crap out of the franchise's most popular character.
Tokyo Gore Police (product link) Action/Adventure / Horror Wildly inconsistent tone hurts this splatterfest. Over the top gore works well in stuff like "Riki-Oh" or "Evil Dead", which is obviously kinda' campy and not taking itself too seriously. TGP is DEAD serious from the get go, the story is very dark, and Eihi Shiina never cracks a smile or lets the audience know she's in on the joke. The whacked out sci-fi premise was pretty interesting but undermined by the silliness of the gore.
Kinda' like an uneven mix of "The Machine Girl" and "Blade Runner", it's still worth a look.
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Too tedious. The gore effects were shot poorly. It needed to be more consistent like Dead Alive or Story of Ricky.
I agree the tone was inconsistent and hurt the film a bit, but disagree that the film is attempting to be dead serious. I think there's just a clash between this particular deadpan comedy style and the slapstick gore.
Pretty much everything that comes out of anyone's mouth is LOL-worthy, the CGI is total crap, the dialog about Megalodon is literally lifted word for word from Wikipedia, they re-use the same action shots over and over, and Lorenzo Lamas' character completely disappears out of the movie with no explanation.
Dobermann (product link) Action/Adventure / Crime Explosive, vicious, and funny, this cult gangster flick from France offers up plenty of enjoyable thrills. Vincent Cassel is excellent as the charismatic thief Dobermann, but Tcheky Karyo steals the show as the psychotic and brutal cop tailing Dobermann's gang. This flick is stylish without taking itself too seriously.
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This flick moved along at a nice clip and than came to a screeching halt in the club scene. This movie is still alot of fun though.
Star Crash (product link) Science Fiction / Action/Adventure This Italian "Star Wars" wannabe is so hilariously bad I don't even know where to begin. Let me just say this: it's got David Hasselhoff in mascara having a lightsaber duel with stop motion animated robots. If THAT doesn't make you want to see "Star Crash", nothing will.
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OMG I do not want to watch{{{{SHUDDER}}}}David Hasselfhoff! You should warn people if you are going to use his name! And he always wears mascara. Exscuse me I am about to be physically ill!
Shuttle (product link) Horror / Thriller Decent little thriller wholly grounded in reality. A couple of minor plot holes are easily glazed over by the breakneck pace which is maintained throughout. Good suspense and a nasty ending.
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For me the true test of this film was how much it stuck with me months after viewing. Immediately after first watching it I was pretty unimpressed, but it gets creepier with time.
Circle Of Iron (product link) Action/Adventure / Fantasy A nice attempt at bringing an original Bruce Lee script to life, but Jeff Cooper is just so terrible and awkward (with both his acting and his action scenes) that he drags the film down to the level of camp.
For Bruce Lee completists or lovers of cheese only.
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Jeff Cooper's real world fighting abilities do not translate well into this film, and he was no kind of an actor, so he is a lead weight on "Circle of Iron."
A Nightmare On Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (product link) Horror / Thriller My personal fave of the NOES series, this one isn't as frightening as the original, but introduces audiences to the pun-spewing, wisecracking Freddy that I grew to love so much. :) Full of corny jokes and awesome death scenes, plus the concept of "dream powers" was really cool.
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Not my favorite Elm Street movie but it completely rocks regardless.
I have to agree with you completely here. This was my introduction to the series, and was the first "real" horror movie I ever saw. Some absolutely brilliant effects here, an unquestionably high water mark in the genre and the series.
Halloween [1978] (product link) Horror / Thriller Michael Myers was the first and best of the serialized slashers. This flick is still absolutely nerve-shredding over 30 years later, and 99% of the films the copied it shamelessly never did it as good.
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Outstanding horror flick! Great acting coupled with suspense made this a modern Horror Classic!
Killing Zoe (product link) Crime / Drama An American safecracker teams up with some French junkies to rob a bank. The heist part of this movie is good, but the best part is the drug-fueled bender the night before the job. "If you smoke this, you will feel as if the world is inside a bubble of glass, and you are rubbing up against it like a bad windshield wiper." Awesome. Plus, anything with Julie Delpy's boobs is okay by me.
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Damn, I thought I was the only one who saw this movie. Good calls.
Hell In The Pacific (product link) War / Drama Practically a silent movie since neither character speaks the language of the other, both Mifune and Marvin rely on their incredible physical acting skills to convey all the fear and frustration of being stranded on a desert island. This tale, of two enemies forced to cooperate to survive, is timeless and haunting, but unfortunately it falters at the end. Apparently unhappy with an ambiguous finale, the studio tacked on a horrible and nonsensical ending, but everything leading up to it is gripping.
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4.5 star main body of the film + 2.5 star final sequence = 4 star rating. I remember thinking "This is really good" when first watching it, and then "THAT's the way they're tying it up?" at the end.
Ip Man (product link) Martial Arts / Action/Adventure Donnie Yen continues to impress. I'm sure plenty of creative liberties were taken with this pseudo-biographical account, but the straight-forward story hits all the right emotions to give the fight scenes extra weight. Oh, and the choreography is sublime and amazingly fast.
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I'd give it the full five stars but beyond that I couldn't agree more. Donnie cannot be stopped.
A thoughtful and beautifully filmed period drama starring Haruka Ayase as a blind travelling Shamisen player/swordswoman. Tonally somewhat darker than the original "Zatoichi" flicks, there are still several lighter moments interspersed throughout, as well as the expected lightning-fast action.
I'm also pleased to report that the producers resisted the urge to make the female Ichi into a siren character who uses her sex appeal to her advantage. There is no grindhouse/sleaze element to this flick at all, which is somewhat refreshing despite the recent successes of films like "Machine Girl" and "Tokyo Gore Police".
The characters in this film are very human and real, and serve as the focus for the storytelling, as opposed to being centered on the action. Ichi seems weary and only fights when there is no alternative. Takao Osawa is touching as the noble but cowardly Touma, and the two main villains, played by Riki Takeuchi and Shido Nakamura, are hilariously evil.
Some of the use of slow motion and CGI blood seems a bit excessive and might grate on some people, but this is a minor complaint. For the most part the action is well filmed and realistic--i.e. no flying or sparking/clashing blades, just fast and fatal swordstrokes. Well worth a look for anyone who enjoys samurai drama or swordplay.
Samurai Rebellion (product link) Drama / Swordplay/Sword(s) Toshiro Mifune and Tatsuya Nakadai are both brilliant in this intense samurai drama. You can see the rage slowly build in Mifune as his loyalty is tested, abused and tested again by his superiors. Torn between following orders and maintaining his personal/family honor, eventually there is no recourse for Mifune but to unleash his fury.
A thoroughly enjoyable drama with an explosive battle at its climax.
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I'd go much higher in my rating, although I don't like this quite as much as Kobayashi's "Harakiri" or "The Human Condition." Mifune's speed and energy are remarkable in his action scenes.
R-Point [Korean LE 2-Disc Box] (product link) Horror / Thriller I generally hate ghost/haunting movies because I find them so implausible and silly. This one actually delivers some chilling moments and a nice dose of violent war action to boot. Worth a look for anyone who likes horror with suspense and atmosphere instead of just gore.
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A very solid and chilling psychological thriller with a eerie atmosphere
Ong-Bak 2 (product link) Martial Arts / Action/Adventure It's Conan meets Apocalypto with kung fu and elephants. Awesome.
While some might bemoan the lack of tons of stunts and Muay Thai (there aren't as many "WOW" moments as in his previous efforts), the variety of unarmed and weapons fighting on display is tremendous. I was especially thrilled to see an extended sequence using the three-section staff during the finale. Jaa clearly put in a ton of work here, but it's a shame the production ran into problems and we are denied an ending to the story.
Here's hoping the sequel rises even higher than the bar set by this film.
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While quite incomplete as a story told-in-one, this seems to be a grand setup for a longer series. The martial arts choreography is first rate.
Army Of Darkness (product link) Horror / Comedy "This is my Boomstick" will live forever. Campbell returns as Ash from the "Evil Dead" flicks to unleash his particular brand of violence against an army of skeletal soldiers. Classic one-liners and novelty gore.
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"That was just pillowtalk, baby." Yeah, I'm down with Ash too. Mad fun.
We used to have this on constantly at the video store I used to manage, since it was rated PG-13 (and therefore appropriate for in-store play) but still kicked so much ass. :)
Twilight (product link) Thriller / Romance Mormon Vampire Abstinence Porn strictly for chubby teenage girls. I hate myself for being cajoled into seeing this. Chock full of bad acting, bad effects, and the leads gazing longingly at each other for ENDLESS takes.
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I also have not seen this movie but agree completely with you and slave 2. I believe that knowledge of this movie and the book series has permanently lowered my sperm count and contributed to the decline of civilized advancements.
I've never seen this film and yet through empathy regarding the trailers I saw of the film i hated it! (and i probably abstained from 10 years of mental deterioration not watching this garbage. ignorance is sometimes bliss)
Bloody Fight [1972] (product link) Martial Arts / Action/Adventure Pretty weak old school chop socky with a tired Chinese school vs. Japanese school story, and below average martial arts.
Most of the fights consist of people randomly swinging their arms, and there is very little diversity among the boxing styles.
For Your Height Only [DOUBLE FEATURE] (product link) Action/Adventure / Crime My. God.
What did I just witness? I'm not entirely sure, but it was unbelievably funny. Weng Weng is an absolute monster, tearing up the screen as only a 2 1/2 foot tall midget can. He is irresistibly charming and a completely legit badass at the same time.
This is better than all the James Bond and Austin Powers movies rolled into one.
The Storm Riders (product link) Swordplay/Sword(s) / Fantasy A poor fantasy/wire-fu/CGI mess that relies so heavily on its effects that the rest of the film is second rate. A weak story, generic characters, lame dialog, etc. The film might've been a nice visual feast ten years ago, but it looks sadly dated today.
And since the effects are the only thing this flick has going for it, there's not much reason to see it now.
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In general I agree, but I am old enough, or my vision is faulty enough, that the visual effects don't disappoint me as much as they do you. It's not the worst thing I've seen, but it really isn't much to crow about.
Dororo (product link) Action/Adventure / Fantasy This fantasy/action flick totally blew away my expectations. A guy with SWORDS FOR ARMS partners up with a spunky tomboy and goes on a demon-slaying rampage. The monsters are a mixed bag of CGI and rubber suits, but for the most part they look pretty good.
The action slows down a bit in the second half as more of the backstory fills in, and the ending seems a little sudden, if only as an obvious set-up for a sequel. Other than that, it's a supernatural monster-hacking good time with some quality fight choreography.
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This is hardly a good film, but I like it very much anyway.
New Police Story (product link) Action/Adventure / Martial Arts This flick has one great stunt sequence, one good fight, and almost two hours of HK melodrama and Jackie Chan crying. Skip it.
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lol I gave it a higher rating than you but I can appreciate your point of view :)
If one is expecting a continuation of the Police Story series, in either characters or style, this film is a huge letdown. Sometimes Jackie Chan just wants to prove he CAN act,: I liked it better than you did, but JC 'd be wise to stick within his genre
Plan 9 From Outer Space (product link) Science Fiction / Thriller This is (with good reason) Ed Wood's best known film. It's also his most hilariously bad, filled to the brim with glaring technical and continuity errors, awful acting and ridiculous dialog. "Future events such as these will affect you in the future" LOL what? It has zombies and aliens and none of it makes a lick of sense. I gave it a decent score just because it's such crap that it makes fabulous entertainment. I've seen it dozens of times, and it never fails to make me laugh.
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Dead-on Denizen. I own his in both the vlack and white, and colorized versions, and watch it repeatedly. I also have the entire movie in mp3 format, and listen to it on my zune. Believe it or not, this really adds a great element (only listening).
Sword Of Justice [3-Movie Set] (product link) Action/Adventure / Swordplay/Sword(s) An okay story, and it's novel to see Shintaro Katsu acting with his eyes open, but WTF at this flick? Since when is rape a police interrogation tactic? Weird.
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they gave a whole new meaning to the term "meat tenderizing". :)
Miike's prequel to the high school beat 'em up manga "Crows" is a little confusing at the outset. Not being familiar with the source material, I was initally kind of overwhelmed by the large cast, and multiple gangs in the school. You see, every single person at Crows school wears all black, and most spike their hair. Everyone likes to pose and look tough, which makes it tricky to discern who is who, or follow the constantly shifting alliances among the gangs.
Once I figured out who the main players in the story were, things made much more sense. There's not a lot of the traditional Miike "weirdness" in this flick, though the pacing seems odd at times--like following a rousing hard rock opening with a slow and lame J-pop interlude.
Though the buildup can try the patience slightly, the final reel makes it all worthwhile. A climactic battle in the rain crosscut with important scenes for two other main characters is stunning and worth the wait. Crunching punches and rib-shattering kicks abound in some of the nicest brawling scenes I can think of.
One other note specifically concerning the Malaysian DVD version: the English subs are full of hilarious Engrish. Be prepared to tease the actual meaning out of the nonsense. Best example: "Here is dangerous!"
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I feel the same way about it. The characters and buildup are less interesting than they should be, but the payoff is exhilarating.
The Twilight Samurai (product link) Drama Despite being short on typical samurai action, this film is an instant classic. A bittersweet story with complex, fully realized characters, beautifully filmed and well acted, and culminating in an inescapable but savage duel to the death.
Marco Polo (product link) Martial Arts / Action/Adventure Richard Harrison comes across as slightly confused as the pointless title character Marco Polo. This is a good flick, packed with excellent fighting and training sequences (plus a rare turn as a villain for Gordon Liu), but the inclusion of a white guy seems to be just a gimmick. The role of Marco Polo could easily have been made a generic Mongol general without affecting the story at all, since he just stands around and watches everyone else fighting for the whole movie.
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I agree Denizen but him standing in the way so to speak still has no effect on the outcome of the classic gem still gets 5 stars from me.
The Prodigal Son (product link) Martial Arts / Action/Adventure Definitely a genre classic, "Prodigal Son" is loaded with a superb and skilled cast, excellent choreography and a story that covers more ground than just the usual "you killed my teacher!" plot line. This one begs for multiple viewings.
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Some of the best action choreography to be found. This is a great film.
Haute Tension (product link) Horror / Thriller An awesome, nervy, gore-filled thriller for the first 75 minutes. Then comes the infamous plot twist that undoes so much of the build-up work. A great horror flick with a really dumb ending. Still enjoyable for the majority of its running time.
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Lots of people think the ending works. I wish I could see that viewpoint...rest of the film is awesome.
Come Drink With Me (product link) Martial Arts / Action/Adventure Historically significant and stunningly beautiful, "Come Drink With Me" features the original great teahouse fight that all other teahouse fights in martial arts cinema want to be. A classic.
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Cheng Pei Pei is delightful, and the film is far ahead of its time in the coherence of the action sequences. This is very historically significant, but holds up even without that proviso.
Alien Vs. Predator: Requiem (product link) Science Fiction / Thriller Too many crappy humans, not enough alien ass kicking. The alien ass kicking that was there was filmed too close and without enough light. Boo. At least most of the humans died horribly.
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I couldn't see a damn thing in this film. Where were the freakin' lights!!?? This cinematographer needs to be drawn and quartered.
Aliens (product link) Science Fiction / Horror Genius. Horror, sci-fi and action have never blended together so wonderfully. Incredible set/creature design and effects that still look great to this day. Essential flick full of classic scenes and timeless one-liners.
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People keep telling me that the original is better, but they're wrong. Every aspect of "Aliens" just works perfectly, and it may be the best fun ride around. James Cameron knows how to produce a thrill, and that's the end of the story.
The Chinese Boxer (product link) Martial Arts / Action/Adventure Historically significant for being one of the first movies to depict a gang of Japanese fighters taking over a Chinese boxing school/town, a common plot in following years. Unfortunately this flick is seriously undermined by the weak kung fu skills of its star, Jimmy Wang Yu. He's young and handsome here, but Wang's fighting ability is just not up to snuff. I felt bad for Lo Lieh (as the head Japanese fighter) having to act like he was afraid of Wang. Tons of spraying blood in every fight, though.
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It is almost always best to use talented martial artists in martial arts films. Not doing so was Shaw Brothers' biggest mistake in this movie.
Wang Yu is a brawler not a kung fu guy. Sorry but this film is awsome. Plus this film define kung fu films as we see it today before the times Bruce Lee which wasn't long.
A Slice Of Death (product link) Martial Arts / Action/Adventure David Chiang does a serviceable job playing a Shaolin monk charged with rebuilding the temple after its destruction (with dynamite!) at the hands of Pai Mei. Lo Lieh is menacing as always as the white brow priest, but something about this production seems off a bit. Maybe it's just a little slow. It's perfectly enjoyable, with decent choreography, but doesn't really do anything original with the well worn plot.
So Close (product link) Action/Adventure / Martial Arts Stylish, if brainless, action fluff starring three of the loveliest ladies this side of "Charlie's Angels". A total guilty pleasure.
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Accurate, but the killing off of Shu Qi earlier and expecting the others to carry the finale was a crime.
The Last Hurrah For Chivalry (product link) Swordplay/Sword(s) / Martial Arts Early John Woo wuxia outing which sets the tone for his later films. Lots of drama, manly bonding, and copious bloodletting.
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